I forgot to tell you about the Halloween party we had for the kids. Remember, I was complaining about parents not RSVP-ing? Yeah, well, they never did RSVP and only one boy from Jack's class came. No one from Mackenzie's class came. Thankfully, we have made some wonderful friends in our neighborhood with children close to my kiddos' ages that were able to come over. Mac said that she didn't mind that her class-friends didn't come because she had fun anyway. I was so proud of her attitude! So, why was I, the so-called "Grown Up" bitter?? Because I refuse to let the idea of "good manners" die? Because I didn't want my children to be hurt and sad? Absolutely! I am over it now, of course, but it was still frustrating. Mac said that some of her friends couldn't come over because their parents don't know us. Well, DUH! That was the main reason for having the party...so that Scott and I could meet her friends AND their parents! Oh, well, we'll try again another time..
Jenny Craig is still going well. I am cheating a lot, it seems, which I don't like but I have still been able to lose. A couple of weeks ago, I decided to let myself have a "cheat" day, especially now that I am exercising regularly. Most of the time, I am able to stay "in control" of my eating habits but this past week has been harder. We went to the movies and out to eat Friday night, so I assumed that would be my "cheat" day. I didn't go overboard; I just enjoyed some of the food I haven't allowed myself to eat in the last 2 months. Unfortunately, the next day (Saturday) turned out to be a REAL "cheat" day.
We were watching the LSU game and I was cooking for Scott and the kids and I came down with a bad case of the munchies. After I had snacked on some Tiger Tators (Zapps potato chips from La.), I decided that I was going to eat a meatball sub with my family. For the past 2 months, my family and I have eaten different foods at every meal and I have been okay with it. But, for some reason, on this particular Saturday, I'd had enough. I wanted to eat with my family...not just "with" them but eat the same food they were eating. So I did. And I liked it. It felt good to kick back with my family and enjoy the football game with some great food. It felt "normal." It also makes me feel angry because I wonder if I'll ever be able to be "normal" when it comes to food. I absolutely hate the way I have allowed food to control my life.
So, now, I have a couple of days before I weigh in and I must get back on track. Honestly, most days I do not struggle like I did this past weekend. I think it must be natural to have set-backs like that and I hope I am over this one. I'm pretty sure I am. I woke up early this morning so that I could go for a walk/run but I couldn't find my sports bra anywhere without waking up my family, so I decided to catch up on my blogging! I'll exercise later, I promise!
And, for those of you who are counting, I've lost 18.6 pounds so far. My goal this past week was to lose 1.4, so that I can be at an even 20 (in 2 months!) but I don't know if I will make that goal. If I don't, I don't...if I do, I do...I just have to take it one day at a time....